Oh, no, not another checkup?!

Checkup

The checkups still cause
a tightness in my chest–
a primal fear

Every three months
the doctors poke and question–
Any bone pain?
Appetite OK?
Muscle weakness?
Headache?
Nausea or vomiting?

Every six months
the lab tests and x-rays question, too–
CBC? CEA? LDH? CA 27-29?
Shadow on the screen?

Each time I pray for
"within normal range"
and wonder
what I will do
if the answers
are wrong
again

(Excerpted from Fine Black Lines, (c) 1993, 2003 Lois Tschetter Hjelmstad)

Comments

Hilda 09-12-2012, 06:06

Yes~
Those check ups???

I recently had my 20 year check up~

I call my check ups my yearly …
wake up call>>>
To remind me what is important…
and, what is not~

Thru the year…
I seem to want to just ‘be’
In my old comfortable shoes>>>

But, my yearly check up~
Puts me in ‘new’ shoes…
and, reminds me
What I learned >>>
thru my journey with breast cancer.
It is my “New Normal”>>>>

My prayer is always,
“Thy will be done.”
And, please give me strength~
It is bigger than me~

In summary, what gets me thru :
“Fear knocked at the door…
Faith answered..
No one was there.”

Breast cancer is a hell of a teacher…
Many, many life lessons…
And…yes, blessings too~
But, sometimes…
It’s like, Oppps what was that???
Oh, it was a blessing~
Still, I am humbly grateful~
And, would change nothing~
It is my journey .

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